Belgrade – A Conclusion – Part 1

Belgrade – A Conclusion – Part 1

“Life is what happens when you are making other plans.” – John Lennon

Do you plan your life to the minute details of how it should be? Most Americans will tell you yes, thanks to all those bargain-on-the-shelf, flying-off-the-chart pop psychology, self-development books like how to organizing your life in 30 minutes, life skills for dummies, etc. and etc.  Your school counselors grill you about your life plan: how do you imagine your life five or ten years from now? Heck! Job interviewers interrogate you about your professional outlook to know what you see yourself doing before letting you dig into their 401K. A former boyfriend of my high-school friend told her the age marks when he would buy his first car, mortgage his first house, get a wife.

At this rate, I am not surprised if he already knew when the chromosomes of his and his wife would combine to produce the perfect-planed baby.  In America, you read “7 Habits of Highly Effective People” to learn how to priority your life to achieve your potential and live your life to the fullest. It is good stuff, and the Americans are right. 

“We don’t have a budget plan here.” The former boss of Katka, my Czech roommate from Sarajevo, said to her when she asked him about the company’s budget plan. “But this is a bank; you have to have a budget plan.” She insisted. “Katka, here in the Balkan, we don’t plan, you have to get used to it.” He struck back.

How do you see your life five years from now if your city is under siege, the longest siege of a capital in modern history? Can you see yourself professionally in the next ten years when just by going to school you risk being a target for snipers? What plan do you have for the future when your yesterday neighbor points a gun at you the next day? When you have your first car, first apartment, and first spouse becomes irrelevant if your birth name becomes your death sentence. But this post is not so much about Sarajevo as it is about the lingering demons of its past or more precisely about the people who might have perpetuated these demons.

It’s officially now; I have made it a life goal to visit every single country in Europe. Why? People ask me. I don’t know; a goal is a goal. Some countries you just have to see like the big three Spain, France or Italy. Some, it’s so damn convenient like England where most international flights stop over. Some are too exotically inviting to resist like Greece or Turkey. Some, like Denmark, you descend for the weekend just because you find a ridiculously cheap flight for 25 EUR return. Some like Germany you cross the border to get a new stamp in your passport to legally stay where you are. Some you go to say that you have been to Andorra. Some keep on lurking in your thoughts, and you will never have peace until you get there.

Here comes a problem. ‘Serb’ and ‘Serbia’ provoked a certain adverse reaction to me. It’s neither right nor wrong; it’s purely psychological. It’s probably the collective emotion I experienced after living in Sarajevo. The war in Bosnia is no longer a piece of news, and the Bosnians are not merely faceless names on the newspaper. I lived, talked, had coffee with them and heard countless stories. Bit by bit their past pain and current hatred became mine. Residing in a Bosniak-controlled city, I could not or didn’t bother to find any Serbs to hear their side of the stories. I left loving almost everything Bosnian and hating everything. Anyway!

Belgrade – A Conclusion: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4